Dear Young Woman,
We see you. We see the two worlds that you seem to be trapped between. We see that there are so many trying to tell you who you should be, what you should value, and how you find your worth. Unfortunately, the “right” voice is seldom the loudest, and it is pretty easy to drift off track and find yourself in a place where you don’t want to be.
So I wanted to pass on some wisdom to you that I have learned as I have moved from youth to adulthood that may help you stay the course.
1. Give God His Due
Proverbs 3:6 says, “In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight.”
This is everything. Please understand that your purpose is not to have a perfect career, a perfect family, a perfect life. Your purpose is to worship God, and encourage others to do the same. Make God a true priority (not just on Sundays) and jobs, careers, and families will come at the right time. Which leads me to my next thought…
2. Be Patient
Psalm 37:7 also says, “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way…”
Don’t rush to grow up, meet “the one,” get married, have kids. Take time to be you. Wait on God’s timing, and God’s man for you. Better to wait longer and make the right choice than run into something that isn’t right. Remember, God wants what’s best for you. Period.
3. Be Sensible
In the New Testament we read, “…Encourage the young women… to be sensible…” (Titus 2:4-5)
Let your good sense guide you, not your emotions. Letting your heart be your guide isn’t Biblical. The heart is deceitful. It is time for godly women to use their brains. As you interact with others, whether they be friends, boyfriends, or anyone else, let your emotions be a thermometer, not a thermostat. Let your emotions tell you what you’re feeling, but don’t let them define your actions and reactions. Stop. Think. Be kind, seek to understand before passing judgement, and don’t attribute to malice what can be explained by ignorance. Don’t assume someone is attacking you, but be gracious and forgiving.
4. Be willing to work hard
“Whatever you do, do it from the heart, as something done for the Lord and not for people.” (Col 3:23)
Whether it is schoolwork, a part time job, or your first “real job,” give what you are doing the same effort you’d give if God was watching. Because He is.
As we read about the wise women in Proverbs 31, we find, “ She senses that her gain is good; Her lamp does not go out at night.” This includes church… you are a valuable worker in your church, you have the freedom and autonomy to serve and serve well. Use it! You will grow more serving than sitting in a pew, and the blessings will multiply.
5. Stay Pure
The author of Hebrews says, “Let marriage be held in honor among all.” (13:4)
It’s worth it. Keep your mind clear enough to look at relationships accurately (see #3). Look for someone who will make a good partner in a life that honors God. Don’t dally with guys that aren’t worthy because you want them to change or think you can change them. Don’t be fooled by shiny and good-looking, but place a high value on your heart. Maintain a high priority on integrity, commitment, and the fear of God, and insist that your partner does the same.
Young woman, none of this is easy. You will make mistakes along the way. Just because you do, don’t for a second think that you are unworthy. God loves you so much that He sent Jesus to die for you! No matter how many victories or defeats you face as you grow up; know that you are precious in God’s eyes and loved as a daughter of the King. That is your worth, given to you by the greatest Father you could have, not dependent on anything or anyone on Earth.
We see you. There are dozens of women watching and walking alongside you. We care about you. We are here for you!
In Christ,
Liz Looten